After The Oscars Nomination...

I'm surprised at some names that were called (Sally Hawkins), and shocked by some that weren't (Oprah Winfrey). I have wrath inside of me that needs to be projected somewhere (No Emma Thompson? Why???). I have to make a fun post to help me feel better. I'm not sure if I'm truly funny but I try.

So, these were what happened right after the nomination...

I cannot speak of what did not occur... and what did not occur was my nomination for Best Cinematography, and Best Original Score.

Oh, I'm not going to that... Hell yes you are, you go and show them it's their biggest mistake not to nominate you, sister!

So Chris, I heard you are announcing the nominees. Did they grant you early access to that list? Am I on it? (The answer, sadly, is no, you are not.)

Actually, what I need is my nomination.

Yes, if I hide behind a superstar I will be nominated. It works with Brad, and it works with Leo. Now I'm two-time Oscar nominee.

Suck it, Adam Sandler. I get to call myself Oscar nominee, while all you get is Razzie nominee.

I'll pardon you for looking so gloomy. All is truly lost now. You weren't nominated.

You know, I was up all last night. I was so anxious... Why Cate? Why? You knew there's not a chance you are not being nominated, right? You are after all, the front-runner.

Minions are celebrating they successfully tumbled the students of Monsters University for a nomination. I guess nobody told them the statue is not a banana.

Just stay away and you'll be safe from me. I'm gonna turn the Oscar ceremony into an ice world if they don't give me the statue.

Do you think this gown is gorgeous enough for the ceremony? (By the way, these two men are going to win. Yes, that's a man. That's Jared Leto.)

Tell me! Where's my nomination?

Are you in pain right now? What, are you kidding me? Of course I'm in pain, I'm snubbed, for Christ's sake.

Look at me! Look at me! I'm an Oscar nominee now, and you're not.

Yes that's right. They keep coming back and nominate me. Ladies and gentlemen, may I present to you the most overrated actress in Oscar history. EVER!

Okay, okay. All of you already get that nomination. At the expense of Tom Hanks, Emma Thompson and Tom Hanks.

But it did happen. You're nominated. What won't happen is that you won't win.

And so Meryl told Amy: Let's star in an Adam Sandler movie next year. They'll nominate us anyway. They'll nominate us in anything and everything.